In the Space of Not Knowing

There comes a point where clarity doesn’t just fade—it completely disappears. I’ve been there more times than I can count. Moments where the plan I thought I had for my life no longer made sense. Where the direction I was walking in felt… off. Not wrong exactly, just no longer aligned. And standing in that space, not knowing what to do next, felt heavier than anything I had already been through.

Young woman self-reflecting abstractly.

I’ve pushed through trauma, navigated situations that could have broken me, and carried responsibilities that didn’t pause just because I was overwhelmed. So when I reached a place where I couldn’t think my way forward, where there was no clear next step… it didn’t feel like a pause. It felt like failure.

That’s the part people don’t talk about. When you’ve spent your life figuring things out, surviving, adapting—not knowing feels unnatural. It makes you want to retreat. To shut down. To wait until something makes sense again before you move.

But I’ve learned that this is the moment most of us misunderstand. Because for me, not knowing wasn’t the absence of direction. It was the moment my spirit was asking me to stop overriding it. I didn’t need more information. I needed to get quiet enough to feel what was already there.

Not loud. Not obvious. Just… present.

There were days I wanted to escape it. Distract myself. Go back to what was familiar, even if it wasn’t right for me anymore. But every time I tried to run from that space, I found myself starting over—repeating cycles, revisiting the same feelings, the same confusion. It wasn’t until I really stayed that something began to shift.

Not all at once. Not in a way I could immediately explain. But in small moments. Choosing to focus on one thing instead of everything. Choosing not to rush a decision just to relieve the pressure. Choosing to sit with discomfort without labeling it as wrong. That’s where my perseverance started to change.

It stopped being about pushing forward and became about staying present. Because the truth is, I still don’t always have clarity. I’m rebuilding. I’m creating. I’m stepping into something new without having the full picture. And some days, that still feels daunting. But I’ve learned I don’t need the whole path anymore. I just need to stay connected to the part of me that hasn’t failed me yet. My spirit.

There’s a quiet confidence that comes with that. Not because everything makes sense, but because I’ve seen what happens when I don’t abandon myself in the middle of uncertainty. So now, when I find myself in that space again, the space of not knowing, I don’t rush to escape it. I pause. I breathe. I listen. And then I move, even if it’s small.

Not because I’m certain. But because I’m still here.

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If this space feels familiar to you—if you’re navigating uncertainty, rebuilding, or learning how to stay when everything in you wants to run—this is a journey I’ve been living and unfolding in real time.

I’ve recently put together a guide to help me navigate my perseverance journey and use my YouTube Channel, Born Beautifully Boundless, where I go deeper into what it means to persevere, reconnect with your spirit, and move through life without needing all the answers at once.

It’s not a perfect plan or guide, but it’s honest. And if you’re in a place where you’re trying to find your way back to yourself, it may meet you there.