BBB#53
Learn to manage yourself positively because it controls the height of your happiness.
My Life: So I am watching this movie dealing with eating disorders. The main character will not eat anything and exercises profusely. All bone and she is about to die. I began to think about how the mind is so powerful that it can take control in such negative ways. When what we genuinely want is our minds to take control in positive ways. My reflection began out of fear. I didn’t want to keep repeating the same destructive patterns, so I thought that reflection would help change the trajectory of my life. The problem is that I didn’t know the first thing about how to reflect appropriately. Merriam-Webster defines reflection as an often obscure or indirect criticism: a thought, idea, or opinion formed or a remark made as a result of meditation.
In its vagueness, reflection can be both a negative and positive experience. Criticism can build or break down. Meditation should be a positive stress-relieving activity, but like many things, we can go about them in all the wrong ways (BBB#14 Routines Produce). So much like the girl whose mind keeps her from eating to maintain her idea of health and beauty, my mind meditates negatively, focusing on negative criticism instead of positively directing with an opinion that builds the spirit. Exercise and reflection are healthy things to do for yourself but everything with moderation and to support health. If your actions aren’t building you up, they break you down, and you should no longer participate in them with the same mindset. Sometimes it will take professionals to help you out with a healthy way to transfer your energy.
Reflection: What I realized is that I am battling negative self-talk every day. Just like the drinker, or sex addict, or any other host of issues that we submerge ourselves within. One day at a time, more often than not, we should see a progression toward a balanced lifestyle. More than I realize, I am fighting for my self-worth to see my True Reflections. The books, writing, relationship, family, conversations, the journey is all about getting back on an even playing field with the voices inside my head. Learning to balance what is genuinely there and give myself hope for a better day rather than beating myself up for not being perfect.
The Test: I began to pay close attention to how my reflections make me feel. I should feel uplifted after meditation and sitting with reflective thoughts of self. I will never be perfect, but what progressions did I make today that are better than yesterday. What can I do to make tomorrow better but not forget the beautiful things from today? The goal is to Aspire (HIM: Poetic Expressions of Self-Worth) to be a better version of myself in the here and now. What are you doing now that should be making you better but seems to be bringing you down?
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